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by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 12/02/2017, 2:48am PST |
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All the best games writing on the internet was done anonymously, pseudonymously, or whatever you call it when you only use your first name or chet's first name or marvin's first name. Remember UK Resistance? Remember Affectionate Diary? Would it shock you to learn any of those guys had day jobs on the other side of the aisle? Writing well about games is such a ridiculously narrow skillset that someone who wants to do it full time would be stupid to turn away any paying work, no matter the source.
Here's how to tell if a games writer is worth listening to or not, entirely separate from whether he's corrupt or not or a serial masturbator or not or anything else that doesn't fucking matter: try some of the games he recommends. If they're "crap", then so is he (or she, ladies are doing it now too I guess). I don't personally think it makes a difference whether Ben Kuchera's ignorant opinions about games are coming from a wallet fat with cash or from his own heart fat with arterial fat. On top of that, it doesn't make a difference even more because I'm never going to see his opinions unless some presshat sniffer like you retweets them on a site for writers I actually like. (Obviously I'm talking about Quarter to Three, here.)
Now let's go back and look at the tweet. Ben is saying he has to pay writers to review games, and unless those reviews bring in enough traffic to offset the cost, it's a losing proposition. So developers had better work real hard to convince him it's worth taking a chance with his organization's money. This reminds me of how I feel when I'm browsing indie games on Steam, so already it's a thousand times more relatable than the story of how Gone Home changed the way he snoops through women's bedrooms or whatever it is Ben writes about normally. It's also a thousand times more relatable than some angry internet weirdo getting outraged that games writers aren't perfectly transparent beings of light zipping through the hull of the Enterprise to impregnate Diana with a baby of pure journalism, instead they're mostly shlubby degenerates complaining about nothing. WHO COULD HAVE GUESSED.
What does the WSJ's code of conduct say about murder? I ask because if you don't stop teasing my son, I'm going to have you killed. |
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Kuchera by he's terrible 11/25/2017, 11:31am PST
The entitlement! by Mysterio Lollerson 11/25/2017, 12:26pm PST
Can you diagram the tweet in a way that helps me understand why it's stupid? by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 11/25/2017, 12:55pm PST
He's basically asking for a developer to bribe him to write about video games NT by Can't be fucked to do his job 11/25/2017, 1:37pm PST
Getting bribed to do something is the definition of a job. by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 11/25/2017, 2:38pm PST
Okay sir thank you for your fat mouthy words and opinion NT by Spigot the Bear 11/25/2017, 2:52pm PST
Re: Can you diagram the tweet in a way that helps me understand why it's stupid? by Horus Truthteller 11/25/2017, 4:14pm PST
I'm going to try teaching you with a parable, like Jesus. by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 11/25/2017, 6:47pm PST
It's funny that you think payola is the only way journalism can function. by blackwater 11/25/2017, 7:16pm PST
This is a strong post. It's argumentative, yet orthogonal to anything I've said. by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 11/25/2017, 8:20pm PST
1. I don't think Kuchera is a good reviewer, and 2. his post reeks of arrogance by blackwater 11/26/2017, 8:57pm PST
The arrogance of a man who feels ENTITLED to the sweat of his brow. by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 11/26/2017, 9:06pm PST
I'm going to try teaching you with abuse, like Catholic school. by Horus Truthteller 11/26/2017, 8:55am PST
You're not making fun of Ben, you're caveman retweeting him. by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 11/26/2017, 12:17pm PST
I'm starting to doubt that you're Ben's mom. NT by Horus Truthteller 11/26/2017, 2:27pm PST
Here's why games journalism is crap and you're a moron for defending it by mike williams usgamer 12/01/2017, 7:41pm PST
Christ, is this dated or what? by He hates gamers now 12/01/2017, 7:59pm PST
Yeah, I'm not reading any of those. by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 12/02/2017, 2:48am PST
The marriage of art and commerce you're defending is as barren as yours. by Saltlord 12/02/2017, 6:14am PST
Your subject line is asking Ben Kuchera's mom if she had any kids who lived. A+ by Ben's Mother, Mrs. Kuchera 12/02/2017, 8:43am PST
A barren marriage is not the same as a barren cunt NT by (smoking a fine oak pipe) 12/02/2017, 9:31am PST
Hands up, how many people in this thread are recent immigrants? by Easy there Kenji, I already got you 12/02/2017, 12:25pm PST
It appears I struck a nerve. by Kenji Carter 12/02/2017, 12:35pm PST
He was just riffing off the previous post title. Did you just have an aneurism? NT by It was right up there, you double n 12/02/2017, 12:50pm PST
It suggested he was a failson and you should get a divorce by Saltlord 12/02/2017, 11:22am PST
Re: It suggested he was a failson and you should get a divorce by Kenji Carter 12/02/2017, 11:55am PST
Shut the fuck up, oldfag. You haven't done anything interesting since Veronica f by Saltlord 12/02/2017, 12:03pm PST
Hadn't heard of Heat Signature. Thanks! NT by Kenji Carter 12/02/2017, 12:33pm PST
I'd be glad to learn of anything like it. NT by Saltlord 12/02/2017, 12:35pm PST
I was waiting for someone to write a longer post than me so I could spring shut by the jaws on my Spigot the Bear trap 12/02/2017, 12:34pm PST
Because I don't owe you anything and you've demonstrated your stupidity. by Saltlord 12/02/2017, 12:47pm PST
This should be the new about page, the old one wasn't defensive enough. NT by We're not here to wryly amuse you. 12/02/2017, 1:01pm PST
You're welcome. Glad to make a substantive contribution to PIPES. AGDT NT by Saltlord 12/02/2017, 1:13pm PST
i know who this is. will reveal name for 0.00012 bitcoin NT by caltrops after dark 12/02/2017, 11:27pm PST
Re: Your subject line is asking Ben Kuchera's mom if she had any kids who lived by Mysterio Lollerson 12/02/2017, 11:50am PST
Cringe isn't new. Has the housing market driven you to live under a rock? NT by Saltlord 12/02/2017, 12:00pm PST
Did the thought leader cunt get let back in? NT by fuck 11/26/2017, 9:10am PST
Mrs. Kuchera, "Thought Leader" NT by (smoking a fine oak pipe) 12/02/2017, 1:04pm PST
Well, I mean... by pinback 11/25/2017, 2:04pm PST
What Ben meant by "information about why your game is worth the time" by Free rides on the vomit comet, cake 01/12/2018, 11:46pm PST
Fat Fuck Space Camp by Ben Kuchera, "Thought Leader" 01/13/2018, 9:50am PST
Nice Fatshaming, you fataphobe by Thoughtiest Leader,"Thought leader" 01/14/2018, 11:38am PST
"I can't believe we're blaming video games in 2018" by Mysterio 02/22/2018, 8:15pm PST
It's all so very problematic NT by Roop 02/22/2018, 8:33pm PST
Ben fired from Polygon, says it has something to do with rape of his daughter by Vested Id 08/06/2022, 10:47pm PDT
Why in the world would Polygon have an office and make people come in by blackwater 08/07/2022, 6:15pm PDT
He said gamergaters were right. So I suppose that's over and decided. NT by Guy that inlines goatse in 50% of h 08/16/2022, 5:26pm PDT
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