Forum Overview :: Still Life

You're avoiding the point, which is that you read a wikipedia page and think you by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 11:00pm PDT are smart. No heavy locks or no coke can lockpicks, pick one and I will admit defeat on the other even though I am right about both. Is your hunger for a flawless victory so vast? Recall that the original premise is that this is a lock on a conference room in a county services building, thus we are guessing is that it is not an exceptional lock. So maybe one of the three security guards, two instructors, or the FEMA official might possibly know enough about lockpicking to get the fucking door open. Barring that, hey I could probably give it a whirl myself. If people, even Zsenis, fail and end up looking dumb, it is still better than sending 34 attendees home without even trying to do something. You and the FEMA guys are willing to let the perfect be the enemy of the good. The more I think about it, the more I think that this whole insane argument stems from your idea that it's better to do nothing perfectly. It doesn't make sense for emergency planners to think that way. Actually it doesn't make sense for problem solvers in general to think that way, but I've found that a lot of programmers and software architects do get into this mode where they can't see writing in a feature because they can't think of any way to implement it such that it covers all possible edge cases. Sure it probably saves a lot of headaches, but sometimes they are just being fussy. In my line of work, which is more like operations than software, the idea is that you fix problems even if the solutions are awkward or stupid or problematic in themselves. If suddenly someone had turned to me on Saturday and said "okay wise guy you fix it" I would have: 1. Tried to pick the lock. Asked others if they could pick the lock. Try the locks on any other proposed rooms in the building. 2. Called the city library's main branch, which is 2.5 miles away, and asked if there were last minute conference rooms available. The rental fee of $20: well if nobody volunteered I could even pay it myself. 3. Called the main police branch, 1 mile away, and asked if there was a spare space for a FEMA emergency, haw haw, donuts all around. Ditto: courthouse a few blocks down from the police office. 4. Called Portland State University, 3 miles away, and asked for a classroom. This request would most likely be granted; there are a ton of unused classrooms on a Saturday morning, this was a govt endeavor, and most building administrators don't really stress at that point. 5. If even then there was still no place to hold the class, I would ask if people would be willing to try further out or use a church space. Then: calling churches and other facilities. 6. There is no 6 we probably solved the problem a while ago. But that's not what happened. What happened was that all the people waited a half hour for someone to show up with the keys - keys not prepared for in advance - and when that didn't happen, the whole thing was just called off. You keep trying to have a technical discussion about lockpicking, a subject on which our knowledge is jointly sketchy (mine my admission, yours by omission), but I'm trying to have a discussion about problem solving. You can't hack it in that discussion. God I remember when I thought this story was so funny! Now it holds no more joy for me.

Zseni gets FEMA-certified (jk) by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 8:45am PDT     You'd have to be pretty white to get away with carrying lock picks everywhere. NT by Jerry Whorebach 05/17/2009, 11:10am PDT         like dexter NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 05/17/2009, 11:21am PDT             Or a survivalist, or someone really into emergency planning (also white people) by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 11:36am PDT                 Unless you're a repo man. NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 05/17/2009, 11:52am PDT                 So not only were you going to pick the lock, you were going to do it with a torq by wrench cut out of a coke can? 05/17/2009, 1:04pm PDT                     "Torsion". A torque wrench is something different. NT by Ray of Light 05/17/2009, 3:20pm PDT                         Often called a torque wrench or a torsion wrench. A tension wrench is a tool use by Wikipedia 05/17/2009, 5:28pm PDT                             Also a torque wrench is used to measure/limit the amount of torque applied NT by McMoo replacing head gaskets 06/03/2009, 3:57pm PDT                     Always problems, never solutions! This is how you guys fucked up New Orleans too by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 5:06pm PDT                         The complexity of a lock is determined by the number of pins, not the weight. by The More You Know 05/17/2009, 8:40pm PDT                             Total PMA by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 9:04pm PDT                                 Wrong. A heavy lock is one that's hard to cut through. by The More You Know 05/17/2009, 9:33pm PDT                                     Mysterio's Frictionless World NT by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 9:44pm PDT                                         Where is this theoretical Heavy Lock? On a battleship? NT by The More You Know 05/17/2009, 9:57pm PDT                                             What? (laudablepuss) by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 10:05pm PDT                                                 Speaking of alternate worlds, apparently we're back in the one where every by group contains an expert lockpicker 05/17/2009, 10:15pm PDT                                                     You're avoiding the point, which is that you read a wikipedia page and think you by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 11:00pm PDT                                                         it was funny NT by up with pod people 05/17/2009, 11:07pm PDT                                                         Guessing? I already told you what kind of lock it is. by The More You Know 05/17/2009, 11:29pm PDT                                                             Maybe I should join you in reading the wikipedia page for that too. NT by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 11:44pm PDT                                                                 Don't bother, you wouldn't understand a word. by The More You Know 05/18/2009, 12:18am PDT                                                                     Hahaha linked from wikipedia. NT by Zsenitan 05/18/2009, 12:20am PDT                                                                     Did you really spend this much time doing this? Talk about not understanding. NT by motherfuckerfoodeater 05/18/2009, 7:38am PDT                                 Please tell us what PMA means. NT by Quétinbec 05/17/2009, 11:42pm PDT                                     "Pay More Attention", something Choson said to me when making a needless correct NT by Zsenitan 05/17/2009, 11:44pm PDT                                         More PMA fanfic, plz NT by Entropy Stew 05/17/2009, 11:45pm PDT                                     positive mental attitude NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 05/18/2009, 12:14pm PDT                         yes apparently all survivalism revolves around hurricane katrina now NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 05/17/2009, 9:54pm PDT                             YEAH AND BUSH SUCKS NT by "BUSH SUCKS" GUY 05/18/2009, 5:55am PDT                                 I heard from a reliable source that boosh doesn't care about black people NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 05/18/2009, 11:59am PDT                         I'm a little slow, so let me see if I have the joke straight by I need clarification 05/18/2009, 12:46am PDT                             INC on Aqua Teen Hunger Force: "What!? Fries can't talk! They can't fly either." NT by Zsenitan 05/18/2009, 1:05am PDT                                 tell her about how bad the fire was NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 06/04/2009, 10:32am PDT                         So what's your zombie apocalypse survival plan NT by Wade Davis 06/04/2009, 10:16am PDT                             First, form a small group to act as a metaphor for the human condition... NT by Last 06/04/2009, 10:19am PDT     Re: Zseni gets FEMA-certified (jk) by H1N1 06/24/2009, 2:13am PDT         Re: Zseni gets FEMA-certified (jk) by Mysterious Stranger 06/25/2009, 2:49pm PDT             Re: Zseni gets FEMA-certified (jk) by The Caltrops Art Gallery 06/25/2009, 3:50pm PDT             Re: Zseni gets FEMA-certified (jk) by H1N1 08/06/2009, 11:16pm PDT                 Statute of limitations has expired on these posts, so I can't be charged with cr NT by Zsenitan 08/06/2009, 11:22pm PDT                 I know this is mostly irrelevant since Zseni doesn't give a shit, but... by Fortinbras 08/07/2009, 1:36am PDT                     assumes a child mortality rate of 0% NT by gruman 08/07/2009, 2:01am PDT                         .63%, close enough NT by Fortinbras 08/07/2009, 2:08am PDT                             you figure if they can make it one year, they're pretty much golden? by gruman 08/07/2009, 2:25am PDT                                 Child mortality rate is also less than 1% by Fortinbras 08/07/2009, 3:32am PDT                                     You're a huge faggot for caring about this argument NT by gruman 08/07/2009, 3:41am PDT                                         I agree! NT by Fortinbras 08/07/2009, 3:42am PDT                                         he is also wrom i mean wrong by gruman 08/07/2009, 12:42pm PDT                                             i mean gruman NT NT by gruman 08/07/2009, 12:47pm PDT                                                 gruman NT by gruman 08/07/2009, 1:06pm PDT         You're almost as fucking bad as Lizard King. Almost. NT by Fortinbras 06/25/2009, 2:54pm PDT             Re: You're almost as fucking bad as Lizard King. Almost. by H1N1 08/06/2009, 11:17pm PDT     Re: Zseni gets FEMA-certified (jk) by motherfuckerfoodeater 08/07/2009, 6:59am PDT