Forum Overview :: Mercenaries: Playground of Destruction
 
Mechassault was Good??? by Mischief Maker 03/09/2005, 7:14am PST
Original review lost in the depths of Senior Barborito's snatch.

Off the top of my head:

- Rapid-fire auto-tracking any-range missiles are the best weapon BAR NONE.
- No mech customization
- Gauntlet-style enemy generators
- No alpha strikes and big mechs don't seem any more badass than small ones
- linear corridor levels masquerading as canyon walls
- swarms of helicopters more deadly than enemy battlemechs
- Short and horrible RAWK looping over and over during mech fights
- CGI C.O. who makes you feel like a pimply 12-year-old as she assures everyone within listening distance that you the player do indeed pork her between every mission. Sadly, any tittilation that may achieve is destroyed by the fact that her chest is so large and her waist is so thin that she crosses the line from "dream body" to "disturbing mutant freak."
+ I guess it's nice to reload you ammo midway through the mission.
- The enemy generators make that reloading a necessity.

Seriously, Armored Core Nexus is a solid 7/10 game, but that's two more points than MechAssault earns.
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Mechwarrior 4: Mercenaries review by The Joosh 03/07/2005, 1:59pm PST
    Well, you always kicked my ass at it. by bink 03/07/2005, 5:35pm PST
        4 is a lot better than 3. by uh 03/08/2005, 11:56pm PST
            Re: 4 is a lot better than 3. by Casual observer 03/09/2005, 12:24am PST
                Actually MW4, Black Knight, and Mercs were the best mech games ever made. NT by Creexul :( 03/09/2005, 2:38am PST
                If you played MA1&2 you would remember not being able to config mechs NT by The Joosh 03/09/2005, 6:31am PST
                Mechassault was Good??? by Mischief Maker 03/09/2005, 7:14am PST
                    It was "good" but it's no MW by The Joosh 03/09/2005, 7:40am PST
                        Re: It was "good" but it's no MW by Casual observer 03/09/2005, 7:58am PST
                            Keyboard flipping of Fabio proportions. by Creexul :( 03/09/2005, 8:04am PST
                                Re: Keyboard flipping of Fabio proportions. by Casual observer 03/09/2005, 11:10pm PST
                                    Here's a pillow, you know what to do with it. by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 7:29am PST
                                        Re: Here's a pillow, you know what to do with it. by Casual observer 03/10/2005, 11:36am PST
                                            Thanks for telling in detail about your crying jag from losing bad at MW4. by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 2:18pm PST
                                                What a sin to expect the game to be what it says it is! NT by Casual Observer 03/10/2005, 3:31pm PST
                                                    Especially when it says REALTIME TACTICAL COMBAT! by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 3:46pm PST
                                                        To put a final note on all of this by Casual Observer 03/10/2005, 3:57pm PST
                                                            Re: To put a final note on all of this by Mysterio 03/10/2005, 4:10pm PST
                                                                Mysterio turns back on checkered past to fight for JUSTICE by bombMexico 03/10/2005, 6:42pm PST
                                                            Actually it seems the consensus is that you're a nobody who's dumb. by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 4:16pm PST
                                                                This site's cornerstone is negativity you weepy bitches. by Casual Observer 03/10/2005, 4:40pm PST
                                                                    Re: This site's cornerstone is negativity you weepy bitches. by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 4:49pm PST
                                                                    But you've missed the most important aspect of that negativity! by Mysterio 03/10/2005, 5:10pm PST
                                                                        Casual Observer: the new Binro? NT by laudablepuss 03/10/2005, 5:47pm PST
                                                                            Possibly the old binro. NT by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 6:10pm PST
                                                                                Just wanted to chime in here and say by The Cheap Zseni Machine 03/10/2005, 6:19pm PST
                                                                                    Well. I disagree. NT by bink 03/11/2005, 4:26am PST
                                                                        How's that workin' out for ya? by bink 03/11/2005, 4:23am PST
                                                                            Eh, Overrated. NT by Mysterio 03/11/2005, 2:44pm PST
                                                                    Re: This site's cornerstone is negativity you weepy bitches. by Bill Dungsroman 03/10/2005, 7:57pm PST
                                                            No, you are wrong. by bink 03/11/2005, 4:22am PST
                                                                Psh, see that, Casual Observer? Now you've got bink disregarding your opinion.:( NT by I need clarification 03/11/2005, 10:20am PST
                                                                    It's agony from which I'll never recover. by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 11:57am PST
                                                                        Wow, add some pictures and that could be a review by Voyons Donc 03/11/2005, 1:38pm PST
                                                                            Re: Wow, add some pictures and that could be a review by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 2:43pm PST
                                                                                Re: Wow, add some pictures and that could be a review by Voyons Donc 03/11/2005, 3:46pm PST
                                                                                    Directional JumpJets you skill-less twat. NT by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 4:55pm PST
                                                                                        Is "skill-less" a real word? Hyphen and all? So cerebral! NT by Voyons Donc 03/13/2005, 1:22pm PST
                                                                                            That's definitely too cerebral for a plebian like YOU. >:( NT by Creexul :( 03/13/2005, 6:12pm PST
                                                                            I would've made a reply like this to casual stupid. by Creexul :( 03/11/2005, 6:01pm PST
                                                                                In other words, you can't prove me wrong. NT by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 6:10pm PST
                                                                                    Everyone else, including me, already has like 20 times. by Creexul :( 03/11/2005, 6:13pm PST
                                                                                        Point out one instance where my arguments have been disproven. GO! NT by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 6:23pm PST
                                                                                            Okay. This entire thread. DONE! NT by Creexul :( 03/11/2005, 7:32pm PST
                                                                        ZZZZzzzzzzzzzz... by Mischief Maker 03/11/2005, 1:51pm PST
                                                                        This entire "review" is basically incorrect, and not worth the time quoting NT by The Joosh 03/11/2005, 2:19pm PST
                                                                            Prove it. NT by Casual Observer 03/11/2005, 2:28pm PST
                                                                                It was made by you. That's proof enough. NT by Mysterio 03/11/2005, 2:49pm PST
                                                                                    Potshooting half-wit. If you want to lay in on him, do it once and well. NT by Better Mysterios past 03/11/2005, 3:46pm PST
                                                                                        Am i defending one Mysterio or attacking both? I'm so confused. by bombMexico 03/11/2005, 5:33pm PST
                                                                                            You only have -that- one issue? NT by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 5:41pm PST
                                                                                                But he's in like EVERY panel of that one by bombMexico 03/11/2005, 7:18pm PST
                                                                                                    Just who are you caling a homo, you comic-scanning FAG? by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 7:24pm PST
                                                                                                        Re: Just who are you caling a homo, you comic-scanning FAG? by The Cheap Zseni Machine 03/11/2005, 8:50pm PST
                                                                                                            Re: Just who are you caling a homo, you comic-scanning FAG? by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 9:04pm PST
                                                                                                                Re: Just who are you caling a homo, you comic-scanning FAG? by The Cheap Zseni Machine 03/11/2005, 9:59pm PST
                                                                                                                    As usual. by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 10:27pm PST
                                                                                                                        Re: As usual. by The Cheap Zseni Machine 03/12/2005, 8:25am PST
                                                                        Re: It's agony from which I'll never recover. by Creexul :( 03/11/2005, 6:09pm PST
                                                                            Re: It's agony from which I'll never recover. by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 6:22pm PST
                                                                                Re: It's agony from which I'll never recover. by Creexul :( 03/11/2005, 7:33pm PST
                                                                                    I already declared victory some thirty posts ago, that shell has been spent. NT by with older drivers, Casual observer 03/11/2005, 7:41pm PST
                                                                                        Except people aren't done gut laffing at you. NT by Creexul :( 03/11/2005, 7:58pm PST
                                                                                            And you still lost NT by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 8:14pm PST
                                                                                                Wow. That is my only response. by Creexul :( 03/11/2005, 8:21pm PST
                                                                                                    Trying to deflect the issue ain't gonna help, boyah! NT by Casual observer 03/11/2005, 8:24pm PST
                                                                                                        No, no, make no mistake: you're a horrible, terrible poster. by I need clarification 03/12/2005, 11:49am PST
                                                                                                            Re: No, no, make no mistake: you're a horrible, terrible poster. by Casual observer 03/12/2005, 12:08pm PST
                                                                                                                Persona? by False 03/12/2005, 2:03pm PST
                                                                                                                Gayness: starting to stack up with you. by Creexul :( 03/12/2005, 5:35pm PST
                                                                        I'm fucking sick of this thread. NT by bink 03/13/2005, 4:17am PST
                            go douche NT by The Joosh 03/09/2005, 12:01pm PST
                        There won't be a MW5, anytime, anywhere, and we'll sue if there is. NT by Microsoft BeanCounter Department. 03/10/2005, 12:33pm PST
                    Re: Mechassault was Good??? by FABIO 03/09/2005, 1:22pm PST
                        Mechassault doesn't suck, dammit it is better than everquest you fag NT by The Joosh 03/09/2005, 4:06pm PST
                            The Jsoh/MW wars are hotting up. NT by Fussbett 03/09/2005, 4:33pm PST
                                That's......... that's hot. :( NT by Paris "Seasoned Whore" Hilton 03/09/2005, 4:46pm PST
                                WHY CANT WE STOP HATING NT by Cat Stevens - Peace Train.mp3 03/09/2005, 5:41pm PST
                            What about Mech Fucking Commander 2? by laudablepuss 03/09/2005, 9:32pm PST
                                Re: What about Mech Fucking Commander 2? by Casual observer 03/09/2005, 11:11pm PST
                                    Re: What about Mech Fucking Commander 2? by 8===> 03/10/2005, 1:16am PST
                                    Re: What about Mech Fucking Commander 2? by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 7:31am PST
                                        Re: What about Mech Fucking Commander 2? by Casual observer 03/10/2005, 11:22am PST
                                            Re: What about Mech Fucking Commander 2? by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 1:55pm PST
                                                In what concerns you, that illusion becomes reality. NT by Casual Observer 03/10/2005, 2:02pm PST
                                                    I can't wait for your essay on Rainbow Six 2 vs the DREADFUL Splinter Cell. by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 2:23pm PST
                                            Re: What about Mech Fucking Commander 2? by Mysterio 03/10/2005, 2:50pm PST
                                                Dumbass nobody Casual Observer, trumped by a Mysterio? NT by Creexul :( 03/10/2005, 3:09pm PST
                                                Flop : Failure of the game by Casual Observer 03/10/2005, 3:29pm PST
                                                    Re: Flop : Failure of the game by Mysterio 03/10/2005, 3:36pm PST
                                MC2 is good NT by The Joosh 03/10/2005, 11:30am PST
                                    Well played NT by Entropy Stew 03/10/2005, 12:24pm PST
                        Nah, more like a 3rd-Person "Shogo" with a FASA License and shattering windows NT by Mischief Maker 03/09/2005, 6:25pm PST
                            Blow me NT by Don't tell me you love me 03/09/2005, 6:58pm PST
 
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