Forum Overview :: Deus Ex: Human Revolution
 
Interviews by Roop 08/15/2011, 8:37pm PDT
Jerry Whorebach wrote:

It's like Siskel and Ebert, if Siskel and Ebert were the same person. The only thing that could make this better would be...


...Interviews!

Right after I watched this, I happened to read the latest post on Raph Koster's blog. So there's some pathetic, nervous bastard who came slithering up to Koster at last year's Game Developer Conference, and asked if he could somehow ask Bartle for him for an interview for him--please, sir, please for me? Just some random kid with all kinds of fat and watery eyes, and... everybody went along with it. Hell, if I were him I would have been happy to interview Koster, no he shot higher and scored. Of course, he's godawful at interviewing, and uploading to YouTube as well... and hell, he's even bad at just fucking sitting there.



There's four freaking parts, I got to the end of this one, and poor Bartle, I couldn't handle watching more. The kid doesn't let himself interrupt, yet Bartle desperately wants him to interrupt. Skip to the very end, watch how fear makes for a poor interviewer. As I watched it, I thought to myself, "I wish it was the Cable Brothers doing this."

Hey.... You should! Seriously--Matt Chat. Have you watched that fucking shit?

Interrupt them. At first let them go, but you should talk more and more as the interview goes on. Eventually, by the end, you two should be doing all the talking, and hopefully having them hang up on you. It's gotta build though, you know, like how sex is supposed to work. Just use Skype, all these developers are in California and they all have Webcams. Interviewees should be so easy to find, just use Moby Games. Don't expect Warren Specter to do a Skype interview (although he did talk to that Matt Chat guy huh who knows), so like ask somebody like... Sheldon Pacotti. Who the hell is Sheldon Pacotti? Nobody wants to talk to Sheldon Pacotti. But he just wrote the dialog for Deus Ex. Ahhh.

So you just know he wishes somebody cared, anybody, somebody who knew who Sheldon Pacotti is--a genius! But no one knows this, because he's a talent and underappreciated! All you have to do is tweet somebody like that and it should be easy to interview them. Suck up nice. Act like they're really important and famous, vene though you know they are really not. This will please them. Once you get interviewing, remember to interrupt them a lot. The important thing is just to keep the webcam feed on the subject, and create the illusion that you are one person who is insane and acts like you are two people--so never show yourselves. This will create allure. It's the Cable Bros show, so you should talk the most. Watch Letterman or Leno. Interrupting pricks. You must outdo them.

So the goal, at the end, should be Sheldon Pacotti hangs up in disgust.
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The first ever official caltrops.com video review. ^_^ by Class Bore 08/14/2011, 3:48pm PDT NEW
    This is hilarious. I lost it at the part about Rage Against the Machine fans. by Jerry Whorebach 08/14/2011, 5:03pm PDT NEW
        Interviews by Roop 08/15/2011, 8:37pm PDT NEW
    Name one game that did Stealth gameplay Better than Thief 1&2. Just one! NT by Mischief Maker 08/14/2011, 5:39pm PDT NEW
        Beyond Good and Evil by Fullofkittens 08/15/2011, 5:48am PDT NEW
            No, BG&E did Stealth better than Metal Gear. by Mischief Maker 08/15/2011, 9:49pm PDT NEW
                Thief was a game of territories NT by Roop 08/15/2011, 10:04pm PDT NEW
                I think you're letting nostalgia color your memories somewhat. by The Happiness Engine 08/15/2011, 10:23pm PDT NEW
        Splinter Cell NT by WITTGENSTEIN 08/15/2011, 5:13pm PDT NEW
        I haven't played the Thief games(!) by Jerry Whorebach 08/15/2011, 7:12pm PDT NEW
    What are your guys' wank schedules NT by Moog 08/14/2011, 6:31pm PDT NEW
    What the hell is john saying at 1:19? NT by Goomba 08/14/2011, 7:31pm PDT NEW
        Ranged Combat NT by Worm 08/14/2011, 11:32pm PDT NEW
    Was this a Cables production NT by Vested Id 08/15/2011, 12:04am PDT NEW
    ^_______________________________________________^ NT by NDD 08/15/2011, 1:38am PDT NEW
    Would it be OK to post this on the main page? NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/15/2011, 7:25am PDT NEW
        Yes. NT by Class Bore 08/15/2011, 11:28am PDT NEW
            Done. Thanks, fellas. Will host these any time. NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 08/15/2011, 11:41am PDT NEW
    I was expecting more SUDDEN EXCLAMATIONS AND O_O 6/10 NT by WITTGENSTEIN 08/15/2011, 4:52pm PDT NEW
        WHATCHA ALL KNOW ABOUT.... COCKDICKS by This is Chris's Blood 08/15/2011, 8:59pm PDT NEW
 
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