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by Ice Cream Jonsey 03/11/2013, 9:19pm PDT |
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I watched the bits about arcade games. She is a culture tourist, so I don't care what she thinks. But there is one part that came off poorly.
She said that the opening to Ghosts n' Goblins was lazy. Nothing about that game is lazy. That game, its balance and its difficulty is what every platform game since has tried to be. The Angry Video Game Nerd has made a career out of pointing us toward platform games that fuck up what GnG does beautifully, effortlessly. I don't think it gets enough credit. It's hard to make a game that is just hard enough. What other game, more or less unmodified, worked as well in the arcade as it did on the NES?
But here's the part that kills me. At the beginning of the game, Arthur and his girl were on a date. They were on a picnic. A picnic! Name another game - name one other fucking game where anyone is remotely near a picnic. Do that and then tell me how fucking lazy Ghosts n' Goblins is. Arthur wasn't out in the middle of the forest because that is something he liked doing himself, as a man. No guy has ever gone on a picnic unless some part of them loved the girl they were with more than themselves. Have any of you heard the story of the guy who hacked his NES ROM for Donkey Kong so that Pauline was the player instead of Mario? If that guy had a little boy, the equivalent would be hacking the beginning of Ghosts n' Goblins so that those two were at a demolition derby.
Again, she is a drive-by culture tourist when it comes to arcade games, so nothing about this is worth getting worked up for. But to thousands of idiots who watch her stuff, what it contains will be all they ever know about Ghosts n' Goblins. So she can fuck off with how "lazy" it is. Nothing about that game is lazy, er, except for the fact that the torch weapon hurts demons, but you should be trying to get rid of that long before you encounter a demon anyway.
Now, I'll admit that Dragon's Lair doesn't particularly hold up. During Daphne's speech, they should have coded it so that if you hit the sword button 40 times, the animation changes to Dirk cutting off his own head.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey! |
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We finally have Tropes Vs. Women by Worm 03/07/2013, 4:37pm PST 
Really bizarre, but at the same time very boring. NT by Gutsby 03/07/2013, 4:46pm PST
Decent. Nintendo's issues with women were no secret even before Other M. NT by skip 03/07/2013, 5:45pm PST
Other M by Mischief Maker 03/09/2013, 7:57am PST
Samus being a badass was an accident by skip 03/10/2013, 5:23pm PDT
I'd say that indicates feminism is on an even better footing than she thinks by Mischief Maker 03/11/2013, 8:06am PDT
Her thesis is about games, not gamers. by skip 03/11/2013, 5:09pm PDT
But if Gamerz are fine, there's no need for consciousness-raising in the first p NT by Mischief Maker 03/11/2013, 7:00pm PDT
Most people don't believe not having electricity makes you more moral but NT by films continue to use Noble Savages 03/11/2013, 9:45pm PDT
Crystal looked like a much more interesting protagonist than Fox McCloud by Jerry Whorebach 03/07/2013, 5:48pm PST
*ARM ENLARGED TO SHOW GIGANTIC ARM NT by Jerry Whorebach 03/07/2013, 5:49pm PST
Can someone look up the number of games that started as generic/fresh IPs by and then acquired a license? 03/07/2013, 11:12pm PST
I can think of a few off the top of my head by Siskel and Ebert 03/08/2013, 5:50am PST
Batman: Return of the Joker (NES) NT by Last 03/08/2013, 7:00am PST
Silent Hill 4 NT by fabio 03/08/2013, 7:41am PST
True Crime: Hong Kong went both ways. by Jerry Whorebach 03/08/2013, 7:59pm PST
So the problem is women don't get to dish out the ultraviolence? by Mischief Maker 03/07/2013, 9:01pm PST
That's not how the hierarchy goes. Men rescue women, women rescue children, NT by children rescue whales. 03/07/2013, 9:18pm PST
I think making a game for women to powerfully rescue men would be a smash hit NT by A FUCKING IDIOT 03/07/2013, 11:19pm PST
Lollipop Chainsaw? NT by I guess you're right 03/08/2013, 2:00am PST
Why can't women just make videogames? by Gutsby 03/08/2013, 1:44pm PST
GASP. When we want something done we have to do it ourselves? I bet you NT by say the same thing about housework. 03/09/2013, 1:56pm PST
Re: GASP. When we want something done we have to do it ourselves? I bet you by matt mysterio 03/09/2013, 1:58pm PST
Well if the problem is representation, then represent. NT by Gutsby 03/09/2013, 5:17pm PST
Women can't respresent themselves in a given field until it's made a safe space! by Worm 03/09/2013, 7:30pm PST
Women can't respresent themselves in a given field until it's made a safe space! by matt mysterio 03/11/2013, 1:12am PDT
Re: So the problem is women don't get to dish out the ultraviolence? by fabio 03/08/2013, 11:56am PST
Do you guys seriously love rescuing women, or do you just hate listening to them NT by Jerry Whorebach 03/08/2013, 1:10pm PST
I couldn't look past the violence to find the sexism lurking beneath. NT by Mischief Maker 03/08/2013, 3:36pm PST
I bet if the sexism was a score multiplier you could've found it, even in that NT by big confusing mess of violence. 03/08/2013, 4:59pm PST
No, I mean the violence is the more important issue here. by Mischief Maker 03/08/2013, 5:52pm PST
When was the last time her point was relevant to any Nintendo game? by fabio 03/08/2013, 6:22pm PST
Weren't you the guy just bitching about the depiction of Aliens in video games? by Jerry Whorebach 03/08/2013, 7:30pm PST
Apples and Oranges by Mischief Maker 03/08/2013, 8:29pm PST
By human physical strength, I mean. NT by Mischief Maker 03/08/2013, 8:33pm PST
When was the last time an Alien scared anyone? 1979? by Jerry Whorebach 03/10/2013, 5:15am PDT
Woah, check out captain macho here! by Mischief Maker 03/10/2013, 10:34pm PDT
Like post-9/11 Dennis Miller, I honestly can't tell if you're being facetious. NT by Jerry Whorebach 03/10/2013, 10:58pm PDT
In cyberspace, no one can hear your sarcasm. NT by Mischief Maker 03/11/2013, 9:46am PDT
Tipper Gore? Seriously? You might as well join PA railing against Jack Thompson NT by while you're at it. 03/08/2013, 1:33pm PST
Pfft, like I matter at all NT by history 03/08/2013, 6:10pm PST
Raised eyebrows and furrowed forehead: The Video. NT by In Counter-Strike you rescue men 03/07/2013, 11:28pm PST
What is to her left that she keeps looking at? by Souffle of Pain 03/08/2013, 7:25am PST
Portal 1+2, L4D 1+2. Valve does a good job of having women rescue themselves. by Last 03/08/2013, 2:50pm PST
I'm not sure if this is part one of the series or part one of this trope but ... by Worm 03/08/2013, 6:19pm PST
It's effectively like asking why Maid Marian needs rescued in Robin Hood movies. NT by Worm 03/08/2013, 6:37pm PST
Whoops, it was part one of a two parter, well I'll see you six months from now. by Worm 03/08/2013, 6:54pm PST
Re: I'm not sure if this is part one of the series or part one of this trope but by Mysterio 03/08/2013, 8:06pm PST
Re: I'm not sure if this is part one of the series or part one of this trope but by Ice Cream Jonsey 03/09/2013, 8:59am PST
Re: I'm not sure if this is part one of the series or part one of this trope but by Mischief Maker 03/09/2013, 9:11am PST
I remember my pioneering work in this area... by FSBT 03/09/2013, 2:04pm PST
Time to her using the word "problematic" by jawl 03/09/2013, 5:12pm PST
This is handy shorthand by skip 05/28/2013, 9:49am PDT
So what the hell is her point? by fabio 03/09/2013, 11:02pm PST
I watched this for you jagoffs. Like all Internet videos it was way too long. by motherfuckerfoodeater 03/09/2013, 11:39pm PST
No more kidnapped women in games. I got it. by fabio 03/11/2013, 2:24pm PDT
I think we found the code word that causes fabio's brain to shut down :( by Jerry Whorebach 03/11/2013, 2:49pm PDT
Lemme white knight for fabio for a moment. by Mischief Maker 03/11/2013, 3:33pm PDT
http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=151085 NT by I made that joke already :( 03/11/2013, 5:57pm PDT
Whoops. NT by Mischief Mencia 03/11/2013, 7:01pm PDT
So she wants every game to be Omikron the Nomad Soul? by Worm 03/11/2013, 3:52pm PDT
I guess I just don't get the love for helpless female characters. by Jerry Whorebach 03/11/2013, 6:38pm PDT
If Ghost and Goblins was a game about rescuing bananas I wouldn't care. by Worm 03/11/2013, 7:12pm PDT
Is that what she's asking for? Because that would be fucking stupid. by Jerry Whorebach 03/11/2013, 7:48pm PDT
I think you'll be somewhat surprised at least. NT by Worm 03/11/2013, 8:09pm PDT
You were right! (SPOILERS) by Jerry Whorebach 03/12/2013, 8:55pm PDT
Ghosts n' Goblins by Ice Cream Jonsey 03/11/2013, 9:19pm PDT
Daphne was intentionally meant as a send up of the damsel in distress trope. by Mischief Mencia 03/11/2013, 10:06pm PDT
Re: Ghosts n' Goblins by Eurotrash 03/12/2013, 1:49am PDT
Re: So she wants every game to be Omikron the Nomad Soul? by fabio 03/11/2013, 11:58pm PDT
also by fabio 03/12/2013, 12:17am PDT
Ha ha holy shit you're insane. by Last 03/12/2013, 10:59am PDT
When you say "media producer" it totally makes it sound like she used something by other than a camcorder from Wal-Mar 03/12/2013, 1:00pm PDT
epic butthurt 4 the win (go back to youtube Quake) by fabio 03/12/2013, 1:10pm PDT
I think we can all agree that Anita Sarkeesian seems pretty weird. by Gutsby 03/12/2013, 1:30pm PDT
What's insane by fabio 03/12/2013, 2:01pm PDT
Re: What's insane by Gutsby 03/12/2013, 2:24pm PDT
Here's a compromise we can settle on that would make Anita's campaign worth it by fabio 03/12/2013, 8:23pm PDT
Twilight is great for teaching feminism! by Mischief Maker 03/13/2013, 8:48am PDT
So, in your mind, this was all a scheme to get free video games. by Last 03/12/2013, 2:08pm PDT
Gosh. Last, when exactly did you become a sack of shit? by Worm 03/12/2013, 3:40pm PDT
Last didn't say anything shitty by Ice Cream Jonsey 03/12/2013, 3:59pm PDT
Time to leave the Kardashians and all other attention-whore celebrities alone. NT by Mischief Mencia 03/12/2013, 4:20pm PDT
Re: Last didn't say anything shitty by fabio 03/12/2013, 9:15pm PDT
An easy way for her to redeem herself by Mischief Mencia 03/12/2013, 9:46pm PDT
I've always been shit. by Last 03/12/2013, 7:57pm PDT
Yes you're right, it's logically inconcievable that she was aiming for this. by Worm 03/12/2013, 8:16pm PDT
Like Anita, I don't think you're capable of seeing anything past the surface by fabio 03/12/2013, 9:23pm PDT
Thankfully, you're here to help us by Arbit 03/13/2013, 9:05am PDT
Thanks Arbit by Mysterio 03/13/2013, 12:35pm PDT
Oops, I meant to post that in a different thread. by Mysterio 03/13/2013, 1:15pm PDT
HAHAH DISREGARD THAT I EAT COCKS by Mysterio 03/13/2013, 1:38pm PDT
OK, I went and watched the video by Arbit 03/13/2013, 5:11pm PDT
Arbit is not dissuaded by her lezzy lumberjack shirt. by Mischief Maker 03/13/2013, 7:57pm PDT
Double Dragon is a game in which the main character spends the entire time by Entropy Stew 03/13/2013, 8:56pm PDT
Is this the first thing of hers you've sOOOOGODCUMMING!!! NT by Frosty 03/22/2013, 7:21pm PDT
When I call her an objectivist by fabio 03/12/2013, 1:06am PDT
Where o where is Frosty to cum all over an Anita thread when you need him? NT by Jessica Alba 03/13/2013, 2:57pm PDT
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