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Forum Overview
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N.A.R.C.
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by bombMexico 03/26/2005, 1:45pm PST |
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because instead of just hitting the shoot-up button or whatever, IGN wants me to stop and play a little game first. GAY
i start questioning whether the reviewer ever played the game when the first few paragraphs are about the philosophy behind his "whore pummeling" subject line, which he then furiously defends to the outrage that isn't there, because NO ONE CARES
For reference, some of the other crass options I threw around included:
1 Put your hands up so I can shoot you in the balls for kicks!
2 Of course I'm a cop. Can't you feel the authority flying off my club when it hits your face?
3 Man, some mother-*bleep*-ers are always trying to ice skate up a hill.
i was positive he had STOLEN the ball shooting line from me, but it turns out the game is at least 95% gun on ball violence.
also, I guess ign has some sort of policy where all reviews must be 2 pages, no matter how much you hate the game or haven't played it, because the entire first page is made up of shit like
NARC is pornography and peanut butter cup ice cream. NARC is a morning of hooky followed by a nap set to the mellow PBS droning of Draw Along with Paul Ringler. It's a last minute cancellation of a hot date just to make more room for bloody Farscape reruns.
So, PBS and strange food fucking fetish, THANKS IGN. with that faggot gaying everything up, i had to judge the thing by its pictures, the working mans words.
Shooting people in the balls is extreme, exploding their balls off and sending them rocketing into the air is eXtrEEM!!!
LIQUID SOUL! Midway Research and Marketing: People like to chug their drugs, right?
at this point i figure Midway was hoping for positive word of mouth from this.
IGN: "Its a BALL - a machine gun blast to the balls that is!"
Gamespot: "My balls were sweating non-stop!"
1up: "A ball-shattering good time!"
im guessing this doesn't make sense within the context of the game either. or maybe he's just HIGH
also gay: everything else
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They decided to release this on the same day as GoW. Predictable joke coming. by Ice Cream Jonsey 03/22/2005, 6:36am PST 
Re: They decided to release this on the same day as GoW. by bombMexico 03/22/2005, 1:48pm PST
I KNOW GUYS ON *CRACK* THAT MAKE MORE SENSE THAN YOU >:( NT by Creexul :( 03/22/2005, 1:52pm PST
It's $20 NT by Cat Stevens - Peace Train.mp3 03/23/2005, 8:01am PST
$20 = Special friend hits pice NT by Marketing team 03/23/2005, 12:36pm PST
"pice?" You were high when you wrote that, weren't you? NT by Mischief Maker 03/23/2005, 12:39pm PST
how much blood is contained in your balls? by bombMexico 03/23/2005, 8:05pm PST
Re: how much blood is contained in your balls? by Kthor 03/23/2005, 9:09pm PST
Re: how much blood is contained in your balls? by Ice Cream Jonsey 03/23/2005, 9:44pm PST
mine doesn't have little avatars, just imagine something gay next to steve allen by bombMexico 03/23/2005, 11:16pm PST
Hey don't gloss over that last quote, bM. by Bill Dungsroman 03/23/2005, 11:28pm PST
Re: Hey don't gloss over that last quote, bM. by bombMexico 03/24/2005, 12:04am PST
They should have called it Sexual Chocolate. =( NT by Fullofkittens 03/24/2005, 1:06pm PST
This is purely tangential, but Coming To America is by Zseni: Warrior-Poet 03/26/2005, 6:03am PST
Re: Hey don't gloss over that last quote, bM. by extarbags 03/26/2005, 5:25am PST
And! Someone make a firefox plugin that stops me from doing that :/ NT by extarbags 03/26/2005, 5:25am PST
Preview button NT by Preview button 03/26/2005, 9:52am PST
Well that was clever... NT by NOT 03/26/2005, 11:12am PST
Re: how much blood is contained in your balls? by Voyons Donc 03/23/2005, 9:48pm PST
Re: how much blood is contained in your balls? by Voyons Donc 03/23/2005, 9:54pm PST
The link was broken so he didn't get to hear the MP3s NT by binkbot 03/24/2005, 2:28pm PST
No brightly-colored motorcycle helmets with matching kevlar vests? NT by Darth Darth Darth Darth 03/26/2005, 9:38am PST
IGN review: "Not enough mini-games" by bombMexico 03/26/2005, 1:45pm PST
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