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by fabio 02/20/2016, 7:14am PST |
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Let's take the secret society enforcement agency from Men in Black, replace aliens with demons, and make it as dull as possible.
Zero tension, zero peril, glacial plot progression, no antagonist or central conflict for over the entire first half. The entire movie is Keanu showing up to some secret goings downs spot, performing some ritual the audience is in the dark to, and effortlessly overcoming the obstacle before we even know what it is. When Warlock did this, it was a fast paced race between two characters constantly trying to one up the other. In Constantine it's just a string of nameless & dull cgi demon redshirts that are instantly and effortlessly dispatched.
It really is quite a feat to make a movie this dull and pointless in spite of the subject matter and special effects. |
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