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Did you review the last couple Star Wars movies? by Jerry Whorebach 12/01/2019, 7:51pm PST
I liked The Last Jedi. I thought it was really cool how many different types of people were represented. In any other movie, when an actor like Oscar Isaac - whose height is technically measured in apples - has a scene with an actress like Laura Dern, they'll stand him on a milk crate so it doesn't look like he's talking to Gandalf. The Last Jedi was comfortable letting Poe look up to make eye contact, like the handsome little man he is, and all the tall ladies just wanted to put him in their pocket and take him home.

I kept picturing force ghost Obi-Wan going "Poe, you can't win, she has the high ground!" Obi-Wan always had an excuse for giving up, that's how he went from celibate space monk to desert hermit to meddling spirit. "Poe, take my hand, I saved you a seat on the last train to cucksville!" I must say I found it very empowering as a tall lady. Just kidding, I'm actually a fat gook. No, still kidding, I'm actually me Jerry. That's the plot of The Last Jedi in a nutshell, just reversal after reversal until I've written enough that you feel like you got your $25 worth.

Speaking of fat gooks, I thought Kelly Marie Tran's performance was fine and her character was of a piece with the rest of the film. That doesn't mean I'm going to let her off the hook for what her two peoples did to John Rambo. First the VC put him in a tiger cage, then that tubby sheriff tried to run him out of town. She has a lot to answer for, is what I'm saying, and there's a lot of her to answer for it.

I also liked Solo. If you thought Han Solo's voice was too deep and he wasn't explicity Jewish enough, Alden Ehrenreich solves both of those problems. He reminds me of the voice actors Disney gets to play Iron Man in cartoons based on The Avengers, only he mixes a little Harrison Ford in with the Robert Downey, Jr. impression. If you also hated what an unpredictable wild card Han was in the original trilogy, you can relax! It turns out Han only gave the appearance of unpredictability, like the pair of loaded dice hanging from his rearview mirror. You just hadn't seen his previous adventure where he pulled all the same tricks and experienced the same character arc. That was also the adventure where he met everyone he knew, did everything he was known for, and got all his stuff. It was a pretty good adventure.

There's a scene with the femme fatale near the end where the script must've called for "the Star Wars equivalent of venetian blinds, like in a film noir" and these goofy geometric shutters descend dramatically. I love a movie that can be funny even when it's not trying.
So - The Last Jedi NT by What a goatfuck 12/15/2017, 11:41am PST
    Tell me about it! by Mark Hamill 12/15/2017, 11:53am PST
    Not a surprise by fabio 12/15/2017, 11:54am PST
        MILD SPOILERS FAGS by What a goatfuck. 12/15/2017, 6:32pm PST
            Re: MILD SPOILERS FAGS by A total lawyer 12/15/2017, 9:54pm PST
                You got me. That doesn't happen in the movie. NT by What a goatfuck. 12/15/2017, 10:18pm PST
        Did you review the last couple Star Wars movies? by Jerry Whorebach 12/01/2019, 7:51pm PST
            Poe Gameron is 5'8'', that's a midheight NT by NORMAL 12/01/2019, 9:19pm PST
                Next you're going to tell me Rose Tico has a "normal" bodyweight and ethnicity. by Jerry Whorebach 12/01/2019, 10:01pm PST
    It's funny when there are hijinx. :( (spoilers) by Rafiki 12/26/2017, 9:49pm PST
        I love this Luke meme by What a goatfuck. 12/30/2017, 2:40pm PST
    So, I thought this movie was the most acceptable of all the Disney ones by blackwater 01/10/2018, 3:30pm PST
    Is the rest of the franchise going to be like this? by Sfia 01/10/2018, 9:52pm PST
    I love Rian Johnson, but this was terrible. NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 02/02/2018, 3:17pm PST
    TLJ the latest target of Weaponizing The Haters by It's pretty bad 10/02/2018, 3:53pm PDT
        Darn ol' Russians hacked Robert Iger by Damage Control Twitter Analyst 10/02/2018, 10:16pm PDT
            Yes, please, just let Star Wars die. by blackwater 10/03/2018, 5:21pm PDT
                "Don't they have a vault" is truly the best take by Vested Id 10/03/2018, 6:33pm PDT
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