Forum Overview :: Breath of Death VII
 
Re: thoughts one year later (long, rambling, awful) by Mischief Maker 12/24/2020, 10:57am PST
I had a great big response planned out in my head as I started typing this, but it all boiled down to two things:

1. You can't beat yourself up for unexpected consequences to what at the time seemed standard decisions. I'm guessing you guys had many false alarms over your time together, and if you had been as vigilant and reactive all that time as you say you should have been, you might have become insufferable to her. If anything, the villain of your story is a healthcare system that made hospital visits something you had to do cost/benefit analysis in your head at the time.

2. The through line I read in your whole post is you want some way for her to still be alive. Well before this post I knew she was very ill and you loved her very much. Now I know those two things AND that she liked silly dress up. I'm guessing she wouldn't have wanted to be remembered as "that sick girl." If you want to keep her memory alive I'd spend less time beating yourself up over hospital stuff, and more time telling about the things you loved about her.

God knows this quarantine Christmas has brought out some of the darkest regrets from the recesses of my mind as well. You're not alone in this!
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My girlfriend passed away this morning at 8:18 am by laudablepuss 12/29/2019, 11:41am PST NEW
    Take some some time and decompress by The Happiness Engine 12/29/2019, 12:18pm PST NEW
    Oh my god, that's horrible! by Mischief Maker 12/29/2019, 3:28pm PST NEW
    Re: My girlfriend passed away this morning at 8:18 am by Mysteriobama 12/29/2019, 5:51pm PST NEW
    I am so horrified to hear this news my friend. by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/29/2019, 8:00pm PST NEW
    My god by So incredibly awful 12/29/2019, 8:41pm PST NEW
    I’m sorry to hear that. Nothing to add but by blackwater 12/29/2019, 10:23pm PST NEW
    Re: My girlfriend passed away this morning at 8:18 am by Roop 12/30/2019, 3:42am PST NEW
        Re: My girlfriend passed away this morning at 8:18 am by laudablepuss 01/10/2020, 10:57pm PST NEW
    You're next NT by hahahahahaha 12/30/2019, 12:02pm PST NEW
        Wow, that's vile even for this place. NT by pinback 12/30/2019, 3:32pm PST NEW
        Strike one douchebag. NT by Dick Clownshoes 12/30/2019, 5:47pm PST NEW
        Re: You're next by Mysterio 12/31/2019, 4:54am PST NEW
    holy shit, laudable by kyrie derbingingle 12/30/2019, 10:01pm PST NEW
    What happened? NT by Jack Bauer 12/31/2019, 6:39am PST NEW
    The story plus a gofundme by laudablepuss 01/01/2020, 10:59am PST NEW
        Ah, shit, welcome to "The Club" by The Happiness Engine 01/02/2020, 7:38pm PST NEW
            Re: Ah, shit, welcome to "The Club" by laudablepuss 01/10/2020, 6:49pm PST NEW
        Just for historical purposes by laudablepuss 12/24/2020, 12:41am PST NEW
    Gofundme is over, thank you! by laudablepuss 01/10/2020, 6:47pm PST NEW
    Last update, sorry for this sad thread by laudablepuss 01/14/2020, 9:44pm PST NEW
        Hey hey by Ice Cream Jonsey 01/15/2020, 9:58am PST NEW
            Don't talk about her too much by Vested Id 01/15/2020, 3:50pm PST NEW
        thoughts one year later (long, rambling, awful) by laudablepuss 12/24/2020, 12:22am PST NEW
            This is a really good story. by Jerry Whorebach 12/24/2020, 6:29am PST NEW
                :) NT by laudablepuss 12/24/2020, 9:03am PST NEW
            Re: thoughts one year later (long, rambling, awful) by Mischief Maker 12/24/2020, 10:57am PST NEW
                I agree, I hope you will tell us more stories about her when you can, lp. NT by Horus Truthteller 12/24/2020, 12:23pm PST NEW
                This covers everything I wanted to say. by The Happiness Engine 12/27/2020, 12:24pm PST NEW
            so we're done with urgentcare for the night ourselves by Saltlord 12/24/2020, 5:15pm PST NEW
                I somehow missed this reply! by laudablepuss 09/12/2021, 7:54am PDT NEW
            My attendance here is spotty, so I missed this before. by Entropy Stew 12/27/2020, 1:00pm PST NEW
            I'm sorry, laudablepuss. by Fullofkittens 12/27/2020, 1:35pm PST NEW
 
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