Forum Overview :: Cabaret Voltron

THE CALTROPS DRAMA, A POSTMODERN PLAY IN ONE PART by mrs. johnson 08/25/2003, 10:15pm PDT A blessed morn arrives in the wild jungle. The head chimp, a descendant of the Old Man, has had it. The smaller, wilder animals have invaded his sacred lands for long enough. He has burned down the jungle, and then animals are without a place. The scene opens at a burnt down forest to one side and a fruitless desert to the other. Cockroach: Look fellas, I really like us sitting around, stroking each other’s hairy animal cocks. Do roaches even have cocks? Dodo: Maybe we can capitalize things to make them funny. Goo: I’m a bacterium. Cockroach: That’s fine. Hey look, I stepped on a shiny spiky thing. I say we go to its place of manufacture and destroy its maker. Spark Plug: Trash dumping makes Baby Jesus cry. I’ll gather the rest of the animals. Scene 2, Europe Cockroach: What be this place? I’m scared of all the large people. Dodo: ;-) Goo: I will sit here until someone asks me to do something, and then I will complain about it, but do it. Spark Plug: I’m off to Spain. To look at fat women. Sloth: Man, Canada. Does anyone know Canada? Canada, Canada, Canada. Cockroach: Maybe, but the ocean, the boats, the people… Dodo: ONO! Corpse of Lion: Holy shit I’m undead like a motherfucker! Cockroach: Will you help me? Corpse: Maybe. Wait, yes. Ok, let us build a large castle here. Scene 3, Small Shack Cockroach: This is good enough. Dodo: [.] [,] SQUARE BREASTS WITH DIFFERENT NIPPLES!. Goo: That’s fine. I love you. Chorus: FAAAAAAG. Cockroach: It’s ready, invite everyone in. Spark Plug: I’m back. I’m leaving. Monkey: I’m not specific enough, but I’m everyone. I hope nothing ever ends. Dodo: Breasts are square sometimes. Attractive Blonde Man: I sort of hope the future never comes. You know, robots. Stupid ones. Panda: If I pretend to like everyone, everyone will pretend to like me. Cockroach: Everyone be quiet. We must discuss things. Donkey: Bwah, bwah, roast beef, sort of like my cock. I hate clowns. Nobody else say anything, you aren’t personable enough. Scene 3, Today. Cockroach: Sorry fellas, but I have to pierce all your tongues. Sloth: Wait just a fucking minute, you and I are inside one head! Dodo: ºڗº. Donkey: Is that a dick? Chorus: FAAAAAAG. Corpse: I don’t like it. Goo: I don’t like you. Spark Plug: I am sort of here, but sort of there. Cockroach: I agree. Goo: Does anyone remember where I put my face? Corpse: Sigh. Cockroach: HOW WILL IT ALL END?? Moral (by whydirt): Keep your socks and your underwear in separate drawers. the mrs.

THE CALTROPS DRAMA, A POSTMODERN PLAY IN ONE PART by mrs. johnson 08/25/2003, 10:15pm PDT     behind the scenes [special feature!] by whydirt 08/25/2003, 11:12pm PDT