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I had these same teachers by fabio 08/03/2012, 5:28pm PDT
Mischief Maker wrote:

2nd teacher: My AP Psychology teacher, quite possibly the most incompetent teacher I ever had in my K-12 schooling. Case in point: our daily assignments were short multiple choice quizzes at the end of each chapter in the book that we would correct in class. Unfortunately, the Teachers' Edition he used to supply the answers was a different edition than the texts we used, so the answers didn't match up. His solution? Take the highest score in the class, determine how many points it was short of a perfect score, then add that many points to everyone's score across the class. We soon learned that we had as much chance of getting a good grade picking answers at random than by actually trying.

Anyhoo, he liked to give examples of the psychological phenomena of the day by making up stories about himself running into someone with this illness and responding to it with his psychological know-how. Sadly for him, he laid it on a little thick in his favor and the stories became downright masturbatory in how awesome he made himself compared to the ignoramuses he dealt with in these stories. One day I took it upon myself to draw a 1-page cartoon of his most implausible story, featuring him with his glasses and ratty little mustache mounted on a big muscular superhero body in tights and a cape with a huge crotch bulge. My classmates loved the cartoon and it was passed around for a few days before I got it back. I assume he got his hands on it at some point and did not react well.

The school year ended about a week after the AP tests at my school, and the AP teachers all took the remaining extra week to roll in the TV and let us use the period to watch Ghostbusters while running out the clock on the semester. Not this teacher. He had us do an incredibly elaborate writing assignment that required all sorts of draft materials on top of the paper itself, including bibliography notecards. I was a computer savvy nerd and got my research done without needing any notecards to write down sources. I handed in my paper with a full bibliography, but without the notecards! *GASP* He responded by giving me a "D." Not on the paper, on the entire class. Even though I got a perfect 5/5 on the AP test itself, which most teachers just treated as your final exam score.

I've had some great teachers, but those two would give Tom Chick pause over their abuse of authority.


Is it universal that high school psychology teachers are the most useless ones in the school?

Mine was exact same type, right down to the glasses, mustache, and false sense of superiority. Our game was keeping count of the number of times he said "If you will" (record was 84 out of a 90 minute class).

The thing with the notecards was my English teacher. We had to research a famous author and a work of his, then analyze their personal history and why they wrote it. I wrote about H.G. Wells and his themes of 19th century imperialism. I did every part of the paper except a one page diary of what we did in the library every day. Final grade? D. Meanwhile some bubbly airhead wrote about Watership Down and how the author must have loved bunnies, just like her! She had a brown bunny named Mr. Fluffy and he was so cute! Her grade? A.

My grades started noticeable dipping in that class after a popular girl in it was found wrapped around a tree with half an empty case of beer in the trunk. She was in a coma for a week and during that time it was like living scenes straight out of Heathers. Daily prayers to her over the morning announcements, countless assemblies about her, and half of our English classes were now devoted to projects for her (making cards, recording voice greetings). Fine whatever, but it was a tad galling when one of my friends (not popular) got into a major car accident the previous month, was hospitalized with a neck brace for a month, and no teachers organized anything for him.

I finally refused to go along when the English teacher started passing around collections so she could hire someone to make the girl a custom quilt. She did it right in the middle of class, presumably to pressure everyone right as it was passed to them. I told her I didn't think it was appropriate and she went mental, scowling that she could cover "my share" if money was a problem >=(. After that, every single grade on anything open to teacher's discretion (i.e. pretty much everything in an English class) dropped an entire letter or more.
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