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Re: SAVE SCUMMER!! by Zseni 03/31/2003, 10:47am PST
mark wrote:

curst wrote:


So I guess I cheated. Never mind. Nethack IS fucking impossible to win, and the only reward you get for winning is bragging rights over the other freakishly obsessed losers who would probably yell at me for hours on end when they found out about my save-game exploit.


This is also how I beat nethack. I have without cheating made it to hell, but the game seriously bogs down when you get there if you don't have a magic-using character. I do like nethack though, as between it and jumpman there are the games I have wasted the most of my life on. After you get sufficiently good at the game you get to a point where you realize that 95% of deaths are your own fault. The problem is that even with that knowledge, the game is still extremely hard.

mark


No, it's not hard. It's something else completely. Want to know how to beat Nethack?

YOU ARE AN ELF WIZARD. Don't pretend to be anything else. OKAY FIND A CHAOTIC ALTAR. Got it? Good. Sacrifice. A lot. You are looking to get at LEAST a Magicbane. Got one? Good, let's move on.

Repeat the following steps until you are Ultimate:
1. Wander hallways
2. Find monsters
3. Lure monsters into hallways
4. Engrave "elbereth" on the floor under your feet.
5. Kill everything
6. Loot, sort loot. You are, I reiterate, an elf wizard, and beloved of the gods. All you need are bags of holding, spellbooks, food, and good rings. Everything else is optional gravy.

DO NOT: act like a hero. DO NOT: let monsters get anywhere close to you. DO NOT: worry about your retarded starting pet, because if it gets left behind the luck offset will be quickly made up in sacrifice bonuses, and you will eventually be Wishing for a blessed figurine of an Archon or other suitably Supa Buff (tm) pet type. OH YEAH you can have MORE THAN ONE pet Archon, so share the love. Remember, you don't even want to see monsters if you can help it - just lob fireballs wherever they are likely to be (don't hit the Archon! They get cranky.), and once you max out your level you might as well have all the high-level pets you can get so they can surround you like a mob of feathers and haloes and whatever.

Congrats, you have obtained the Amulet of Yendor and returned safely to the surface. Haven't you procrastinated on your final/term paper/spec revision/performance review/debugging long enough? No? Throw a couple samurai/healers/cavepeople at the grid bugs until you give up and decide procrastinating is actually harder than work.

Nethack is an extremely high-level, complicated, involved, super-duper version of Solitaire. It's tediously entertaining or entertainingly tedious, take your pick.
PREVIOUS NEXT REPLY QUOTE
 
What Sucks about Nethack? by Mischief Maker 03/30/2003, 10:27pm PST NEW
    First five minutes were boring by foolio 03/30/2003, 10:39pm PST NEW
        Nethack is an old Unix console game played with ASCII by greybears with suspend NT by ers NT SB 03/30/2003, 10:52pm PST NEW
    Are you trying to troll the whole fucking universe? by Zseni 03/30/2003, 10:42pm PST NEW
        Translation: "Such Power..." NT by Mischief Shai-hulud 03/30/2003, 10:55pm PST NEW
            HURF FUCK U BUDDY by Zseni 03/30/2003, 10:57pm PST NEW
        Re: Are you trying to troll the whole fucking universe? by Jhoh Creexul 03/31/2003, 12:22am PST NEW
    Either Nethack is broken, or I honestly, truly suck at PC games by Alternate789 03/30/2003, 11:05pm PST NEW
        Re: Either Nethack is broken, or I honestly, truly suck at PC games by curst 03/31/2003, 9:14am PST NEW
            SAVE SCUMMER!! by mark 03/31/2003, 10:20am PST NEW
                Re: SAVE SCUMMER!! by Zseni 03/31/2003, 10:47am PST NEW
    Re: What Sucks about Nethack? by ydrt 03/31/2003, 1:24am PST NEW
    Put me down for this: by conflictNo 03/31/2003, 2:08am PST NEW
 
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