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| Let's talk about Steven Seagal for a minute by I need clarification 05/02/2008, 12:10am PDT | ||||
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| Every night for the past couple of weeks there seems to be a new(ish) Steven Seagal movie on cable. I've never heard of any of these, and they were all made in the last six years! The last one I heard of was Exit Wounds, which was I believe one of the ones where he teamed up with a rapper. One of the rapper ones was a decent-sized hit and I thought he might be coming back after the sudden (and unexpected) turn as a SECOND FIDDLE in Executive Decision, in which he didn't even make it to the second half of the movie! I couldn't believe it when he died in Executive Decision. What's happening, I thought. Is he wearing a secret parachute? Did he catch the tail of the plane and is he crawling back to the hatch, or karate-ing open a new hole to climb in? How dare they kill him off right at the start of the fucking movie!
But then The Glimmer Man and Exit Wounds came out and I figured maybe Executive Decision was just a glitch. But no. After that, check this shit out! Pistol Whipped (2008) (V) .... Matt Urban Justice (2007) (V) .... Simon ... aka Renegade Justice (UK: DVD title) Flight of Fury (2007) (V) .... John Sands Attack Force (2006) (V) .... Cmdr. Marshall Lawson Shadow Man (2006) (V) .... Jack Foster Mercenary for Justice (2006) (V) .... John Seeger ... aka Mercenary (International: English title) Black Dawn (2005) (V) .... Jonathan Cold ... aka Foreigner 2 (International: English title: informal alternative title) Today You Die (2005) (V) .... Harlan Banks Submerged (2005) (V) .... Chris Cody Into the Sun (2005) .... Travis Hunter Out of Reach (2004) (V) .... William Lansing ... aka Poza zasiegiem (Poland) Clementine (2004) .... Jack Miller Belly of the Beast (2003) (V) .... Jake Hopper Out for a Kill (2003) (V) .... Prof. Robert Burns The Foreigner (2003) .... Jonathan Cold ... aka Cudzoziemiec (Poland) Half Past Dead (2002) .... Sasha Petrosevitch ... aka Halbtot - Half Past Dead (Germany) Ticker (2001) .... Frank Glass ... aka The Other Side of the Law (Philippines: English title) I think the first one I ran into this week was "Out for a Kill." I couldn't believe this horrible title, especially for a movie starring the same guy from "Hard to Kill" and "Out for Justice!" Who is he, Sonny Chiba? This is craziness. Then I remembered this was when he was being extorted by the mob or something who forced him to make movies, so I guess they just kept churning them out. |
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