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by Quétinbec 12/04/2019, 9:39pm PST |
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Mr. 3000 wrote:
What have you been up to for the last few years?
Some key facts:
Two children (soon two be three) with two different brown skinned women who are both under 5 foot. One is quite attractive.
Oldest boy child lives in the slums of a third world country sharing a bed with his mother and a tiny room with his aunty and her baby which he calls his 'sister'. He doesn't really know his actual sister.
Oldest boy child resembles his mother more than me. He has a flat nose without a bridge. I am ashamed of his appearance.
This boy couldn't brush his own teeth, dress himself, or wipe his own ass at 6.5 years of age because his mother does it all for him 'because she's such a great mother'.
He's not allowed out of the country because she's worried I'll kidnap him and "He's all she's got. He fills the hole inside her." so she can't risk that. I send monthly payments that aren't much by Western standards. I spend a couple of weeks each year visiting him.
So, I bet you're thinking I'm a bit of a fuck up, eh? Take a few seconds think I'm a piece of shit..................
Now, stick this up your fucking ass: I'm probably worth about $5.5 million USD. I retired at 36 in mid 2018; spent 14 months travelling the world, and now I'm settled in New Zealand. This most recent 14 months travelling is in addition to the decade I spent in the Middle East working what amounted to 6 months on, 6 months off, and it means I've probably spent a total of 6 of the last 11 years travelling the world.
Because of the abnormally large amounts of money and travel, I think I'm better than most people despite the shitty situation with the illegitimate kid.
As for the whoring, I got married in Feb 2016. I started getting money later that year. The money was got under conditions of great uncertainty so, fears of divorce, and fears of God taking everything away from me kept me from fucking whores. I think I also didn't want to hurt my wife but I don't think she would care that much if the whore were a stranger and I was careful.
As for masturbation, I haven't wanked anywhere near as much as I used to. I still fear God's punishment for wanking. I've told people that when I'm drinking and they think I'm the biggest fraud to have all this money and still have such dumb ideas. I'm 38 and don't have too much hanging in the balance anymore, so I don't get why I'm sensitive about this. I do masturbate but secretly, quickly, and shamefully and usually only during periods where I can't foresee anything awful happening. |
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Downloaded the entire site just in case by Vested Id 11/11/2019, 5:39pm PST 
If the web has taught us anything, it's: you can't joke about being a dumb assho by Fullofkittens 11/12/2019, 5:28am PST 
Re: If the web has taught us anything, it's: you can't joke about being a dumb by Ice Cream Jonsey 11/12/2019, 1:42pm PST 
I'm actually Melissa McCarthy NT by laudablepuss 11/12/2019, 8:17pm PST 
the ICJ character turned much less monstrous over the years tbh NT by Fullofkittens 11/13/2019, 11:51am PST 
Many Caltrops people have had a redemption arc over the years. by Ulrachi 11/13/2019, 3:27pm PST 
Re: Many Caltrops people have had a redemption arc over the years. by Creexuls, custom software 11/13/2019, 3:46pm PST 
The Color Monster by Tease Monster 11/13/2019, 4:01pm PST 
Who's got more to lose, Erik or Chet? NT by Mysterio 11/12/2019, 7:48am PST 
Sucks than anybody is even thinking this way by Vested Id 11/12/2019, 8:57am PST 
You have done a good thing. by Quétinbec 12/03/2019, 12:15pm PST 
You're alive! NT by Vested Id 12/03/2019, 2:56pm PST 
Re: You have done a good thing. by Mr. 3000 12/03/2019, 4:50pm PST 
Take a moment to judge me. by Quétinbec 12/04/2019, 9:39pm PST 
Back for more digital self-harm? NT by MM 12/04/2019, 10:27pm PST 
My cousin's a professional surfer. by Jerry Whorebach 12/05/2019, 12:24am PST 
Re: Take a moment to judge me. by Mr. 3000 12/05/2019, 6:16am PST 
Re: Take a moment to judge me. by This is Chris's Blood 12/05/2019, 11:06am PST 
My bucks by Quétinbec 12/05/2019, 11:50pm PST 
Re: My bucks by MM 12/06/2019, 5:14am PST 
I kid! Here's the reply video you were all actually waiting for me to post! by Mischief Maker 12/06/2019, 5:45am PST 
I know we give her a hard time on CalTrops but I like the costumes NT by Mysterio 12/06/2019, 6:20am PST 
Anyone got a shit wife? by Quétinbec 12/06/2019, 10:38pm PST 
A wife and a forum serve different purposes, I think NT by blackwater 12/07/2019, 9:38pm PST 
I've done enough divorce mediations to know better than to ever get married. by Mischief Chad 12/08/2019, 6:12am PST 
Marry an Asian with "old fashioned" values by Quétinbec 12/08/2019, 3:18pm PST 
Marriage is not as bad as doing divorce mediations might make it seem. NT by blackwater 12/10/2019, 9:11pm PST 
this post sprouted a fedora from my head NT by this is like progressive MGTOW shit 12/27/2019, 9:01am PST 
Re: My bucks by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/06/2019, 6:19am PST 
Re: My bucks by Quétinbec 12/06/2019, 10:44pm PST 
Re: My bucks by Mysterio Prime 12/08/2019, 9:36am PST 
Re: My bucks by Quétinbec 12/08/2019, 3:26pm PST 
Re: My bucks by Ulrachi 12/10/2019, 3:47pm PST 
Caltrops does not endorse kidnapping. by Jerry Whorebach 12/10/2019, 7:32pm PST 
Re: My bucks by Quétinbec 12/28/2019, 12:24am PST 
Re: My bucks by Ulrachi 12/28/2019, 12:28pm PST 
Re: My bucks by Quétinbec 12/29/2019, 4:54pm PST 
Cripes, dude, your life really is one big Sophia Coppola movie. NT by MM 01/06/2020, 6:16pm PST 
Re: My bucks by Nintendo Power 01/07/2020, 8:20am PST 
how this ends by Donato Dalrymple 12/26/2019, 9:21am PST 
Re: how this ends by Mysterio 12/26/2019, 9:31am PST 
I'm going to go ahead and think less of him. NT by Donato Dalrymple 12/27/2019, 3:15pm PST 
Watch it. He's done nothing to deserve that. NT by Dick Clownshoes 01/07/2020, 1:25pm PST 
Re: My bucks by Roop 12/09/2019, 10:01pm PST 
UPDATE: Looks like Paul might need that bionic eye too... NT by The Happiness Engine 12/15/2019, 11:33am PST 
And fuck let's be honest, and the arm too. Fuck. NT by Roop 12/15/2019, 12:08pm PST 
Re: My bucks by Lars 10/21/2024, 7:14pm PDT 
Clarification: I downloaded OMM, not Caltrops NT by Vested Id 12/10/2019, 2:35pm PST 
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