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by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/21/2007, 5:50pm PDT |
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The first game was able to carry itself with a bouncy, wacky step, and watching it fall flat on its face every five seconds was kind of cute. This time, it’s serious fucking business. The game is hateful. It starts out with an extended montage of footage from the previous game, followed by a theme song sequence showing various scenes from the second game, the one you’re about to play. Then you spend six hours as a guy named Roxas, who’s obviously just a slightly more realistic-looking version of the actual hero, Sora. There’s some sort of time-shift thing going on. Producer Tetsuya Nomura probably thought much of this sequence is brilliant, or even literary: it starts with a group of kids eating ice cream and lamenting that summer is about to end. One of them dares to ask if childhood will last forever.
There is something especially child molesty about Japanese ning bong games and cartoons that have that kind of shit.
Also I'm sure lots of animewl fags also thought that the scene was brilliant, literary, moving, deep.
Every time I question how dumb KingDUMB Hearts fans are, I see someone actually say "well the story was actually deeper than you might think." They are saying this about a Disney game. You play Disney characters in it. So you can see, I probably could have written a review for this game which would involve playing it to know exactly what to make fun of and it's good that I don't have to do either, so thanks button review game website for that one thing. |
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Looks like Caltrops has competition :( by Jerry Whorebach. 04/09/2007, 1:43pm PDT 
BLOG FORMAT MAKES FOR EASIER UPDATING NT by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/09/2007, 2:24pm PDT 
They're even using the visage of BDR. by Worm 04/09/2007, 3:53pm PDT 
THEY ARE HIRING by Zseni 04/09/2007, 5:19pm PDT 
Re: Looks like Caltrops has competition :( by Quentin Beck 04/09/2007, 10:36pm PDT 
Re: Looks like Caltrops has competition :( by Mischief Maker 04/09/2007, 11:25pm PDT 
Re: Looks like Caltrops has competition :( by Flavio 04/10/2007, 12:00am PDT 
Extremely blowjobby Defcon review. THEY LOSE! NT by Mischief Maker 04/21/2007, 10:41am PDT 
1.5 stars doesn't sound good........ ON PAPER! NT by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/21/2007, 2:00pm PDT 
A nice negative Kingdom Hearts 2 review. by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/21/2007, 2:29pm PDT 
Good thing someone else wrote this review so I wouldn't have to. by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/21/2007, 5:50pm PDT 
You've got way more endurance than I. by Mischief Maker 04/22/2007, 8:15am PDT 
Re: You've got way more endurance than I. by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/22/2007, 10:45am PDT 
Re: You've got way more endurance than I. by KEK 04/22/2007, 11:59am PDT 
Re: You've got way more endurance than I. by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/22/2007, 1:40pm PDT 
1.5 on their scale is supposedly a favorable score, equivalent to 7.5/10 NT by on every other scale. 04/21/2007, 3:15pm PDT 
So what's 4 stars? And what is 0 stars? NT by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/21/2007, 5:44pm PDT 
****=10/10; ***=9/10; **=8/10; *="Average"; 0="Bad" NT by No 7-9 scale here! 04/21/2007, 8:09pm PDT 
So it's the same five-point scale CGW used for 20 years, only 0-4 instead of 1-5 by Jerry Whorebach 04/22/2007, 9:33pm PDT 
Or ****=A; ***=B; **=C; *=D; 0=F (all scales are the same scale). NT by GET USED TO IT 05/05/2007, 1:42am PDT 
Except no, because there's a 0 star review on there that is positive. by Jhoh Cable o_O 05/05/2007, 7:22pm PDT 
A zero-star rating can mean one of three things... by Jerry Whorebach 05/05/2007, 9:03pm PDT 
HE'S TURNING THE WHOLE REVIEW SYSTEM ON ITS EAR by Jhoh Cable o_O 05/05/2007, 9:05pm PDT 
it's the same five-point scale CGW used for 20 years, only 0-4 instead of 1-5 by Ice Cream Jonsey 05/05/2007, 7:04pm PDT 
I think the garbled screenshots are supposed to make a statement about... by Jerry Whorebach 05/05/2007, 8:54pm PDT 
He could also achieve that statement by posting...... NO SCREENSHOTS. by Jhoh Cable o_O 05/05/2007, 9:04pm PDT 
IGN, google image search have you covered for screenshots by King Prawn from POE, Actionbutton 05/25/2007, 12:43am PDT 
IGN has you covered for reviews too. NT by Worm 05/25/2007, 9:30am PDT 
Mranduh still has an mp3 of "Pisspig" by Aku, the band with the guy from that fu NT by Jhoh Cable o_O 05/26/2007, 9:22am PDT 
I've secured us a new poster! I expect 10% of the credit for his contributions. NT by THATS ALOT OF CRED --JW 05/26/2007, 8:44pm PDT 
If anyone else from Actionbutton is reading this, can we have a link? Thx! NT by Me again. 05/26/2007, 8:49pm PDT 
I guess that's an enthusiastic weeaboo "hai" :( by Jerry Whorebach 06/05/2007, 6:01am PDT 
it is? by Flavio 04/21/2007, 7:34pm PDT 
Oh. Well I can't get more than 4 paragraphs deep into those long-ass reviews. NT by Mischief Maker 04/21/2007, 7:43pm PDT 
I can only if I really commit myself and it's something I really want to read. by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/21/2007, 8:33pm PDT 
GOLDEN AXE summary: "Faithful conversion. Game has not aged well." (1500 words) by Ray of Light 04/22/2007, 12:08am PDT 
Here's where I stopped reading. by Jerry Whorebach 04/22/2007, 1:30am PDT 
Re: Here's where I stopped reading. by Zseni 04/22/2007, 4:21pm PDT 
Revision B by Part of the collective. 04/22/2007, 4:28pm PDT 
Re: Here's where I stopped reading. by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/22/2007, 4:59pm PDT 
Re: Here's where I stopped reading. by Mischief Maker 04/22/2007, 5:32pm PDT 
Re: Here's where I stopped reading. by Jhoh Cable o_O 04/22/2007, 6:16pm PDT 
Re: Here's where I stopped reading. by Jack Chadwick 04/22/2007, 6:36pm PDT 
Souffle of Pain by Do you mean the format is similar? 04/23/2007, 2:44pm PDT 
Setting my fields correctly! NT by Souffle of Pain 04/23/2007, 2:45pm PDT 
They haven't updated since April 28th, may never update again. NT by Victory by default? 05/11/2007, 5:13am PDT 
but they haven't sworn to update more often yet NT by OMM, Fail Math 05/11/2007, 5:46am PDT 
2 more reviews today :( NT by mark 05/11/2007, 10:31am PDT 
Come on guys, my reviews are good by King Prawn from POE 05/18/2007, 5:17am PDT 
I just registered for commenting purposes by Grumah 05/22/2007, 9:21am PDT 
Let me guess... by Mischief Maker 05/22/2007, 7:05pm PDT 
Guess again by Grumah 05/22/2007, 7:29pm PDT 
advantages of Supreme Commander by Flavio 05/22/2007, 9:26pm PDT 
Re: I just registered for commenting purposes by Jerry Whorebach 05/24/2007, 5:56pm PDT 
Re: I just registered for commenting purposes by King Prawn from POE, Actionbutton 05/25/2007, 12:41am PDT 
This isn't Prawn by Obvious Joke Brigade 05/25/2007, 1:32am PDT 
Ho ho ho by King Prawn from POE, Actionbutton 05/25/2007, 9:53am PDT 
You seem like promising material. We'll be in touch. NT by Brawl Hall 05/25/2007, 6:32pm PDT 
You expected better... from ME ^_^ NT by Jerry Whorebach 05/25/2007, 12:08pm PDT 
Re: I just registered for commenting purposes by Kitsune 05/31/2007, 1:33pm PDT 
LEAVE THE REAL DEAL TO THE REAL DEALERS BEFORE WE DEAL WITH YOU ^_^ NT by McMoo 05/25/2007, 1:03pm PDT 
huh what? by mysterio 06/11/2007, 11:53am PDT 
You're not foolling anyone you know, Tim. NT by laudablepuss 06/11/2007, 1:35pm PDT 
Re: You're not foolling anyone you know, Tim. by mysterio 06/13/2007, 2:08pm PDT 
http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?action=viewPost&pid=61745 NT by laudablepuss 06/13/2007, 7:09pm PDT 
what huh? by Souffle of Pain 06/11/2007, 1:59pm PDT 
They have added something MORE than just a piddling message board. by Jhoh Cable o_O 06/20/2007, 1:03am PDT 
Rather than being an “offical forum”, THE ACTION KLAXON was an abject failure. NT by Jerry Whorebach 11/11/2008, 12:54pm PST 
They know how to write 7000 word reviews. WE KNOW FORUMS. by Fussbett 11/11/2008, 1:29pm PST 
"Is this the end of Twat Central?": Action Button loses the war by Jerry Whorebach 07/19/2010, 1:57am PDT 
That's probably because he's working for kotaku. :( by Jhoh Cause..... 2 07/19/2010, 11:03am PDT 
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