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| Blade: Trinity (Spoilers!) by laudablepuss 12/11/2004, 6:50pm PST | ||||
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| Pretty damn good.
*** Major spoilers!!!**** Jessica Biel as Buffy the Archer/Vampire Slayer: she's hot so I didn't mind that her character was a weaker, crappier version of Snipes'. FUNEY MANS Vampire slayer: consistently hillarious. Gets every funny line except one by Blade and a couple by the loser sidekicks. The jokes are old in some cases, but the delivery is spot on. And Blade as the straight man is a great joke by itself. Blade vs the original Vampire: good. They made him tough and relatively intelligent. But the movie didn't really delve into the character much. Other characters: exit only to die, apparently. Ass kicking: Awesome. Blade goes GTA on some guys and I laughed. Gadgets: not good. An ultraviolet laser in the shape of a saw? Wow, okay, sure. Arrows that shoot around corners? Uh huh . . . The thing that Blade uses at the beginning to kill vampires? Great . . . but could I get a look at that thing please? It's tiny and practically invisible and I'm not clear how it works. Gigantic four barreled rifle? Great! When do you use it? Oh, okay, never. Fantastic. Wrestiling moves: in Blade 2 they had some WWF-style moves. I thought that was okay and kind of tongue-in-cheek, but many people despised it. In 3, we have Greco-Roman wrestling moves. I don't care, really, but maybe this is a bone for the people who hated the second movie. Ending: strange. So, uh, the weapon they used to kill the big badguy can't be used again anymore? Whatever. Random crap that bugs me: who cares that the Vampire appeared as Whistler to kill everyone? Why wasn't anyone (except the blind chick) watching the cameras? Not that it would've helped, of course. All that and a stack of hot chick corpses that the original Vampire ate. Positive! |
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Blade: Trinity (Spoilers!) by 12/11/2004, 6:50pm PST  This movie is fucking terrible. NT by 12/11/2004, 8:05pm PST laudable vs mrs j, which way do I go? :( NT by 12/11/2004, 8:30pm PST WHY THEY FUCK DID THEY PRODUCT PLACE THE IPOD? by 12/11/2004, 11:33pm PST Yes, that was gay. NT by 12/12/2004, 1:36am PST Some blame me. NT by 12/12/2004, 2:38pm PST Re: Blade: Trinity (Sucks! (Har har!)) by 01/23/2005, 5:12pm PST This movie was made for fans of the book, not moviegoers by 01/23/2005, 7:48pm PST This was one of the worst movies ever by 12/24/2008, 3:52am PST I can't tell - is this good-bad or shitty-bad? by 12/24/2008, 12:40pm PST It alternates between dull and lazy by 12/24/2008, 8:02pm PST Why I'm Not Going to See Blade Trinity, Part I: The Cast by 12/24/2008, 7:13pm PST |
