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by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 4:41pm PST |
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The message of The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay is that it's better to be a latently homosexual pro wrestler than a delicate, outwardly gay and ornately dressed fag. Better to gravelly growl the threat that someone is going to get "fucked" instead of using a European lilt to speak of the prison guards as your "boys". Representing you is the newest inmate of triple max prison "Butcher Bay", smoldering manly man Riddick (who is totally not gay at all (he loves chicks probably)). Representing flaming gayness and all that is evil, prison warden Hoxie, the foreign pretty boy who buys nice things and speaks in a little girly voice.
SHOWDOWN: Kill the effeminate Hoxie. Then oil up and flex.
Surrounding this giant battle over how you should express your homosexuality is a great FPS that everyone should try. Crazy violence like turning a guard's gun back against his face while still in his hands. Actual funny parts like your ED209-esque robot advising you to read the operator's manual after you accidentally back it into a wall. Insanely great graphics that sometimes reduced my computer to tears (looking for LOWER resolutions, I noticed this game would allow for high resolutions my monitor can't even dream of. I think one of the offered resolution figures was in scientific notation.) Finally, the PC version of Escape from Butcher Bay features a great "developer commentary" to the entire game which offers genuine replay value, not fake replay value like "harder difficulty".
That paragraph was the buff Vin Diesel list of good things. On the opposite prancing slender queer side of things was the fact that I got plenty sick of the backtracking and getting lost while in "double max" prison. You'll know what I mean when you get there. Not only is there a sewer level, there are vents and air ducts -- ceiling sewers. I also didn't like the 10 fps that occasionaly assaulted my eyes while my computer was busy doing complex floating point math instead of delivering smooth framerates. Unintentionally hilarious at each boot-up is Vin Diesel's game production company, Tigon. A tigon is a totally radical cross between a tiger and lion, and completely unlike a liger, which is a cross between a lion and tiger and pretty much Napoelon Dynamite's favourite animal.
I know I've portrayed Escape from Butcher Bay as a giant ode to penis, and that might scare off some of you, but there aren't a lot of women in prison. It's a fact. Don't you enjoy prison movies? Animal Factory, American Me, American History X... Butcher Bay has all of that gritty atmosphere minus the scary anal rape.
I still had to bend a guy over the toilet, though.
Haha, relax, I merely killed him. His rubber pants remained on at all times. To win back fans of murder and the right wing, let me show you this screenshot totally unrelated to anything gay. Much scarier is ISLAM:
There used to be TWO muslims praying on the mats (in the "fuckers area"). I killed the other one with my bare hands. You can too! |
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The closest you'll get to an easy way to browse the deleted posts. by Creexul :( 03/13/2006, 6:02am PST 
So Jsoh and I both finished Sacrifice finally. by Creexul :( 03/13/2006, 6:51am PST 
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Re: SSX3 (PS2) by Ivan Dork It 03/20/2006, 3:23am PST 
It's an in-joke for that time period. by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 8:57am PST 
no no no by Ivan Dork It 03/20/2006, 10:57pm PST 
Re: no no no by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 11:14pm PST 
Re: no no no by Ivan Dork It 03/21/2006, 3:40am PST 
Solved by Fussbett 03/21/2006, 9:50am PST 
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Where did you get your Vectrex flashcart? Review plz. NT by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 9:00am PST 
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this really isn't a good review of this game :( by Weyoun Voidbringer 05/24/2009, 4:44pm PDT 
ok I should do a real and honest review so the correct opinion is here by Weyoun Voidbringer 05/24/2009, 5:46pm PDT 
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Re: Ratchet And Clank -- Going Commando NT by Quentin Beck 12/13/2007, 5:01am PST 
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It kicks ass. by Frank McGillicutty 03/20/2006, 1:31pm PST 
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Zwwwweeee fighting? by Souffle of Pain 02/07/2007, 11:54am PST 
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Colin McRae Rally 04 (PS2 EURO) by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 1:48pm PST 
Along those lines by Mischief Maker 03/20/2006, 1:53pm PST 
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Reactions by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 3:45pm PST 
The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 4:41pm PST 
That one didn't get deleted. But I approve of the effort. NT by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 10:09pm PST 
Silent Hill 3 (PS2) (PAL version) by Fussbett 03/20/2006, 4:43pm PST 
AIM log review of Everything or Nothing. by Creexul ^_^ 03/21/2006, 5:50pm PST 
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The Suffering by curst 03/21/2006, 5:52pm PST 
Review: Samurai Warriors by False 03/21/2006, 5:53pm PST 
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Siren: Curst was right by FABIO 03/21/2006, 5:59pm PST 
More Broussard forum posts by Fussbett 03/21/2006, 6:02pm PST 
Front page this, please NT by Souffle of Pain 03/21/2006, 8:34pm PST 
It's old though. NT by Fussbett 03/22/2006, 11:24am PST 
I know it goes without saying, but Fussbett and INC make the best logs. by Jerry Whorebach 05/24/2009, 5:12pm PDT 
jhoh NT by Weyoun Voidbringer 05/24/2009, 5:48pm PDT 
I'm relieved Jhoh is publishing the book, because it sounds like a lot of work. NT by Fussbett 05/24/2009, 8:26pm PDT 
Then when it comes out it's all switched with Mranduh logs. 8( NT by Creexuls, a monster >:3 05/25/2009, 1:41am PDT 
JUNK II by Fussbett 03/21/2006, 6:10pm PST 
Dvorak saying there were great 3D0 games is still as good now as it was then NT by Ice Cream Jonsey 05/24/2009, 5:18pm PDT 
Junk by Fussbett 03/21/2006, 11:00pm PST 
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