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Forum Overview
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Carmageddon Reincarnation
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by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/17/2017, 11:27am PST |
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Saltlord wrote:
When I reserve a car on your on-demand service, Dieter Zetsche, chairman of parent company Diamler on another goddamn continent, do you know that their is no ability to set the time limit, for which I would pay? Do you know that if the timer runs out I can't select that specific car again for two hours even if no one else reserves it because your idiot company wants it available for someone else rather than the existing customer trying to open the damn door after leaving a meeting that ran long? Do you know that the car in question just disappears from my map, forcing me to haul all my work shit to the next one fifteen minutes away or else get price gouged or my time wasted by some newly imported uber driver who doesn't understand how the local traffic works? Do you know that I can only reserve one car at once, even if there's two within a few feet of each other, despite the previous stupid limitation of your stupid UI?
Are you planning on enforcing your two hundred dollar fee for smoking in cars or should I just take a fun no-money-back gamble when I sit down in one that it's not so suffused with dank weed and cannabis that people wonder if I'm a dealer on my way to work? Maybe I should call in and get some drycleaning2go from your response team for the stains I got when someone spilled their drive-through coke all over the interior because you're too goddamn cheap to put in decent cup holders, the quintessential american amenity? Can I get that processed today?
Does making me fuck with your stupid app and call your stupid crew and run around town looking for the next stupid vehicle from your magical disappearing rental car fleet for half an hour to an hour plus REALLY strike you as '2go?' Or are you too busy down at the moneychanger pocketing deutschmarks (douchemarks) after they cashed out all these dollars I threw at your stupid service for the privilege of not driving two of your piece of shit lightweight cars in a row?
So this is what we get for liberating your country from the Nazis and knocking your competitors at BMW on their asses for making all those planes.
My wife had an account that was inactive, I called them on the phone to activate it. I was told they could ONLY!!!!! speak to her. This is a company that lets anyone in town from Matt Russell to James Holmes drive their vehicles, but to activate that account they want a female-sounding voice.
I tried to register an account, they want 2 business days before it activates, which is only crappy in the context of someone blocking the driveway.
A neighbor had an account and moved it and I almost don't want to give that resolution because how you identified their very basic and solvable problems is so clean and pure. But as an aside, the cops did show up 4 hours after I called them. I was outside at the time. The cop pulled over, looked at the spot, shook his head and continued on his way. I love this part because there's an alternate version of this story on some cop forum that ends, "Fucking civilians."
ICJ |
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car2go is a scourge by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/16/2017, 9:08am PST
"Repositioning team" sounds like sarcasm. Just pay the $5 and move it yourself. NT by Oh no my principles etc. 12/16/2017, 9:37am PST
Whew! Thanks for the advice, anonymous guy. Thank God you're here. by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/16/2017, 9:59am PST
Mom, dad, things are going well out here in Los Angeles by Fullofkittens 12/16/2017, 10:30am PST
Ha! I'd also like to take back most of my previous message. by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/16/2017, 10:35am PST
Now apologize for the forum software. by Oh no my principles etc. 12/16/2017, 12:31pm PST
Re: Now apologize for the forum software. by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/16/2017, 12:39pm PST
All this and I haven't even revealed which car sharing company I am the CEO of. by Oh no my principles etc. 12/16/2017, 1:04pm PST
All this and I haven't even revealed which car sharing company I am the CEO of. by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/16/2017, 1:51pm PST
Admit it, for a while there it felt like the old days. We're bringing it back! NT by We're bringing Caltrops back. 12/16/2017, 2:06pm PST
MCGA! Lock her up! NT by MCGA! Lock her up! 12/20/2017, 2:19pm PST
MCGA might as well stand for "How Many Colors Was That Again" because it's what NT by we were all thinking. 12/20/2017, 2:32pm PST
Man, Jonesy doesn't let them loose often but he's got some pretty good ones NT by in his arsenal 12/17/2017, 8:09am PST
I thought you said he was going to respond like a baby? NT by Mysterio Lollerson 12/16/2017, 12:41pm PST
Nah, fuck this guy by that guy 12/19/2017, 6:56am PST
I'm glad we got this thread in before the deadline for Post of the Year. by Oh no my principles etc. 12/19/2017, 10:22am PST
Just stop posting. Problem solved. NT by Oh no my etc "thought leader" 12/19/2017, 11:56am PST
I'm going to share with you some index cards from my Caltrops character binder. by Oh no my principles etc. 12/19/2017, 12:09pm PST
Bring back Bradley Svedka NT by Saltlord 12/19/2017, 8:03pm PST
Oh man, why didn't I listen to you last week? Here's a good post to make up for by Oh no my principles etc. 12/28/2017, 10:24pm PST
Stick to the zingers, this shit you posted here put me to sleep. NT by Mehphistopheles 12/29/2017, 4:52am PST
I enjoyed it, but I also enjoy your posts. by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/29/2017, 11:45am PST
I should've used my real Caltrops name instead of my fake Caltrops name. by Oh no my principles etc. 12/29/2017, 1:36pm PST
I'm a little embarrassed to admit that I had missed the theme here with my NT by previous comment. -Mehphistopheles 12/29/2017, 6:53pm PST
Update: apparently he's back in treatment? by Oh no my principles etc. 01/08/2019, 5:42pm PST
Why is ur family so fucked up NT by Mysterio 01/08/2019, 6:38pm PST
You mean my pretend filipino family, or my real family? by Oh no my principles etc. 01/08/2019, 10:04pm PST
I kinda made that all about me. I can't help it, it's how I perceive the world. by Oh no my principles etc. 01/09/2019, 2:24am PST
I don't know why I didn't include this detail, it's too good. by Oh no my principles etc. 01/09/2019, 3:04am PST
Yo shits dark NT by Mysterio 01/09/2019, 2:19pm PST
That was supposed to be a funny story. by Oh no my principles etc. 01/11/2019, 4:33am PST
It was. NT by Ulrachi 01/11/2019, 2:13pm PST
No mo(re) "Yo" NT by Style Monitor 01/11/2019, 2:20pm PST
Break window, pour gasoline, toss match. NT by The Happiness Engine 12/16/2017, 5:16pm PST
Their UI is as stupid as their arbitrary design decisions. Great kraut company. by Saltlord 12/17/2017, 7:50am PST
This is all great and I support it completely. by Ice Cream Jonsey 12/17/2017, 11:27am PST
car2go network down for maintenance for ~6 hours in DC. Server shat the bed? by Saltlord 12/19/2017, 12:20am PST
car2gofuckyourself NT by The Happiness Engine 12/19/2017, 8:52am PST
You could always leave a bad review on the APP store, that'd teach em a lesson. NT by Mehphistopheles 12/17/2017, 11:24pm PST
one problem by one solution 05/31/2019, 2:33pm PDT
Fucking hero by Ice Cream Jonsey 05/31/2019, 6:25pm PDT
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