Caltrops - Clay Fighters - Me: Unstoppable Defending Machine

Forum Overview :: Clay Fighters

by creativepig 03/26/2003, 10:26pm PST

Chairman Mao wrote:

...circumvent the issue alltogether by playing probabilities and remaining unarmed most of the time.

I carry on my badass person at all times numerous powerful weapons of self-defense. Anyone thinking they want to fuck with me just because I'm about 5'7", 130 lbs and wear glasses is going to have the surprise of their life coming. For instance, in the inside pocket of my jacket I always have three or four mechanical pencils. These little bad boys can not only inflict the most horrendous scratches from the broken-off clip thing, but with a few clicks, extend to a good inch of deadly stab--and at 0.7mm, there isn't a skull I can't penetrate. Also I have several receipts in my wallet printed on the keenest-edged paper imaginable. A well-placed slice will leave a perp rapidly bleeding to death from their severed aorta.

And finally, my last resort (in fact, I'm afraid to use it because of potential legal ramifications), on my keychain is a flail-like bottle opener that could smash someone's head in with the least effort. I've seen the aftermath of such a savage attack and believe me, it's not pretty. The street was closed for a week just for cleanup.

cp